A fugitive, Criminal, thief, culprit, etc. are all wanted persons of breaking the law for a certain crime. They are pursued, but they avoid the pursuer. They are watched, but don’t realize. They are caught, and cannot escape. They now have a ransom that they cannot pay.
Here is my story of the One who has pursued me. Once I was lost, but He found me in my ruins. Paid my debt with His blood, so that i could be set free to tell other fugitives that are caught in the enemies snare; blinded of the Truth, of His hope, love, and mercy. I cannot escape His presence…and neither can the redeemed.
Many are in the pursuit of happiness, but cannot find it. Many are looking in other areas to find a way to take away the pain that they thought happiness would bring. The cars, money, the perfect girl and house; some are not looking at all and for some its a chasing game with God, so they think until they get caught and realize what they had been running from.
I was 10, I live a normal life with normal parents, church every time the doors were open, and every chicken dinner as well. I accepted Jesus as i went to my bedroom and prayed the sinner’s prayer. And i so thought every one else did too, but i found out that they don’t. To be normal i thought was to have Jesus in your heart, so I thought as I went to school the next day and told others what i just did. Some knew of Him and some not. Confused, that they didn’t know Him I had more questions.
I was 14 when we moved to the church where I am attending now. A church that is spirit filled, God-fearing, Holy Ghost hungry & a pastor who preaches the Word the way it should be preached, nothing held back. No 60,000 attend, why? Because the Truth is preached, that anyone doesn’t want to hear. But in a spirit filled church where God is not put in a box, there is correction, re-proof that every believer needs to hear and act on. What’s happened? a New Age movement, that is secret-sensitive is happening. Pastor’s who would rather preach what they want, a “make me feel good” (scripture 2 Timothy 4:4 “They will refuse to listen to the truth and will turn to myths” Not preaching what needs to be preached; the Truth.) The Church, a hospital for the broken and a power house for the believer. Not a museum for people who are missing the very heart beat of God, a dying congregation that has no fire, no drive for the lost. Just stale, bored, contained believer’s who have lost sight of a God that yearns to be sought for His Glory.
I knew right from wrong and if I didn’t do right I was made very well-known about it by my parents, many will say that I was sheltered. If that’s what it was that helped me get to where I am now, so be it. I was a shy, timid little boy who stood up for nothing to no one. With a low self-esteem and a drive to be somebody, I just did not know what was really out there in the real World. I wanted to break out of my “shell” but couldn’t.
I take a lot in; I have always payed attention to the little things in life that everyone else seems to pass by, the details. Some teachers said that I have photographic memory, I once passed a test from remembering the 6 different graphs that he had drawn on the board the 2 day’s prior of passing the test! But I even payed more attention to people around me; Their behaviors and why they did what they did. I seen that they needed help. With the burden for the lost that God gave me at a young age, I knew something that most did not know that would change their life forever. I wanted so bad to tell others about Christ, but like I said, it felt like I had a shell that I couldn’t bust out of. No boldness to proclaim Him. God was beginning to work from the inside out, but like everyone else, we set the boundaries that allow Him to be distant or to be as close as we allow Him. And I decided to be distant because I was scared of what He might have me do, sounds silly but that’s how i thought back then, and what we would have to give up is the reason that most people will not come to Christ. They want to keep their pet sin and think that God overlooks it.
I remember praying one time when I was 12, “God what is your Will?” I seen the The scripture Exodus 4:11-13 as it flashed like a picture inside my mind. Amazed, I rushed to find a Bible and there it read: “But Moses said to the LORD, “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.” Then the LORD said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the LORD? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.” But he said, “Oh, my Lord, please send someone else.”
I believe this was the first invitation to step into His will for the ministry that I later accepted at the age of 22 . Scared like Moses I made excuses. I clearly remember one Sunday when the pastor had called the youth group to the pulpit to tell the congregation of what God had done in their life. I was so nervous, cold sweats, clammy feeling and pasty white; as the pastor looked at me, he continued on to the next person, was I glad! I was running from Him, but He never stopped running after me. I thought to my self, there is no way I can stand here and preach when I feel like this. It takes an encounter for Him to change you, but I ran from every encounter that I could.
I was now 16. like many, the driver’s license. The 6 month’s of having one of your parents teaching you was over, the yelling, mis understanding of road signs and close accidents were over. I was an adult, so I thought. The curfew seemed to still exist but in my own little World, I was happy. But still not satisfied. I began to think that God had forgotten what He had told me a few year’s back. Only that He was waiting on me.
There are many things in life that fill in those gaps but are only temporary. Temporary happiness, excitement, pleasure, all feeling’s that have no permanent place, there is no other substitute than having Jesus, a reoccurring, never-ending, always fulfilling your every need that this World will never offer.
2008 of November, I could no longer sit on the side lines of being “lost” it was my time. A few trials came my way that year and I finally gave into Him on a Sunday night, to declare Him Lord over my life. We sometimes miss the concept of the word “Lord.” Meaning full control, to give Him all of you in every part of your life. After that night, my life not only changed but transformed into what His will is for everyone in this World, a Believer, a Disciple of Christ.
God had it all planned out, in the month of October of 2008 on a Thursday night Revival in the little town of Irondale, MO. I got filled with the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues. Sad to think that most churches do not believe in Him, let’s face it, it’s part of the Trinity, so why not have all of God? It’s not a buffet where you should pick and choose what you want. In this World you need the Holy Spirit, to edify you as you take on this journey of this corrupt World.
At the age of 22, on March 25, 2009 on a Wednesday night. I had become who He wanted me to be. A consecrated vessel, apart from this World, to do His service in this lost and dying World, a generation who has lost the sense of His fragrance, His love, and mercy to overcome any addiction in any type of circumstance. As one of my brothers in Christ that i think of highly as a man of God and very anointed, God had directed him to where i was at, the altar that was being stained by my tears that were earnestly seeking Him for what He wanted me to do. God began to speak through Him, He began to say ” You have a heart for the lost, and I Am going to use you, whenever you stand in front of My congregation, you will not be nervous, boldness will come upon you to speak Truth.”
April 19th, 2009 would be my first time preaching at SMCTC Southeast Missouri Community Treatment Center otherwise known as Aquinas. Located in Farmington; would by first temporary position of evangelizing. Today I preach when I can mostly at Harvest Christian Centre, who has Catalyst (College & Career)
I have met so many awesome people as I continue on this journey that He has called me to be on and will meet many others as the years pass by.
“My passion and desire is evangelize to all the AA Clinics in the USA to preach the Truth that needs to be heard to the afflicted, broken-hearted. Until then God Bless each and every one of you.”